When I decided to go to Japan for the first time, I was nervous!
Questions kept circling around in my head. I couldn’t shake them:

• ​What is Japan really like?
• What do the Japanese people like to talk about?
• How can I become friends with Japanese people?

• ​What if I make a big fool of myself?​

I loved Japan. I loved everyone I had ever met from Japan (still do)! The last thing I wanted was to go to the place of my dreams and watch everything I believed in crumble. 

I needed to know a few things–I needed to know what the Japanese people were like, what they liked to talk about, and how they perceived foreigners. 

I started reading blog posts of others who had lived in Japan doing what I was going to do—volunteer missionary work. One of them had said that the Japanese people were surprisingly open about a lot of things, once you started up a conversation.

Well, with that knowledge, I felt reassured. I didn’t need any more information. I was ready for Japan—ready to talk about myself and have them open up and talk about themselves with me. 

Unfortunately, that was a wrong move. I should have done more research! 

Once in Japan, I got on a train for the first time and forgot all common sense. I sat next to a Japanese lady, and asked her expectantly, “So, how old are you?” 

I really……. don’t know what I was expecting. I could immediately tell that she felt awkward. And I felt awkward. Inside, I was smacking myself over and over. Why on earth did I ask that?

That wasn’t to be my only blunder, but it did teach me an important lesson: There are just some questions that can’t be used as a conversation starter, no matter where you are in the world. 

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So, what do Japanese people think about foreigners? Particularly, Americans?

Well, judging from my first experience, I could only assume that they thought that Americans are nosy, loud, impolite, and completely lacking in regard for common sound restraints.

As I spent my year and a half there, though, I learned that there were a few more things that Japanese people thought about Americans. 

First, Americans are cute.

I lost count of how many times I overheard groups of high schoolers (mostly girls) say that I was cute (“kawaii!”). 

Second, Americans don’t know Japanese. 

One stormy day at the Hachioji Station, I trudged to a nearby convenience store. I was hungry and wanted my favorite to-go snack: onigiri! So, I walked in, and overheard a panic ensue at the cash register. “I can’t speak English!” the employee lamented anxiously to his coworker.

Thankfully for all of us, I wasn’t totally inept at Japanese. But most Japanese people assume that foreigners aren’t going to know anything. 

The plus side to that is that Japanese people are incredibly patient at helping you figure out what you want to say in Japanese. They listen intently, even if it’s out of a sense of duty.

Third, America is cool, and so are the people. All Americans are outspoken and outgoing.

There are particularly some youth who admire Americans. When I learned this, it made me want to be my very best, energetic self. I wanted to be the “American” they wanted me to be—funny, enthusiastic, sympathetic, and adventurous. 

I’ll tell you, though, there was a day I forgot I wasn’t Japanese! I became an American with a Japanese heart. That’s when the actions of other Americans started to get on my nerves. 

Things that wouldn’t have bothered me in America now grilled on my nerves, though I would never confront anyone about it. 

I’ll give you a list of what NOT to do:

• Talking loudly on trains
• Forgetting to take shoes off when entering an apartment or home
• Remembering that you’re supposed to take off your shoes when going into a home, and going in with shoes on anyway
• Incorrectly using Japanese grammar
• Eating with an open mouth
• Blowing your nose in public
• Forgetting to apologize for bumping into others
• Not giving up your seat on the train for the elderly, pregnant, injured, and those with children
• Riding bikes on sidewalks where not posted

And to be honest, I’ve been guilty of quite a few of these! But the only reason I ever broke them was because I didn’t know them. And that adds to the last view that Japanese have of Americans:

Americans are ignorant. 

Americans hardly ever learn all the customs, even those that live in Japan for a number of years teaching English. As a missionary, I wanted to be trustworthy, and that meant that I would try my very best to learn all the customs and rules that I could—and live by them.

Japan is amazing! I want to go back with all my heart–to live this time, and not as a volunteer missionary (though that was an amazing experience, too)! 

I will always strive to do my part to learn the ways of the Japanese, to master the language, and to be an American who proves them wrong. 

I want them to know that I am an American with a Japanese heart who cares very much about them and their way of life. 

HAVE QUESTIONS ABOUT LIFE IN JAPAN?

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